Tag Archives: Disappointment

Oh, Those Emotional Meltdowns!

2 Corinth 10-5It was a day wrapped in disappointment!  I am most thankful that I don’t have many days like that. But not today…this was a dreary, gloomy (sensing winter’s approach) day of emotional let downs. Two of my friends recently lost their loved ones and my heart was heavy for them at their loss of mom and a sister.  Then to top it off, an opportunity came to bless some gals that went south and for whatever reasons it just could not happen. Well my emotions were already tender and I responded with an inward look instead of upward.  I began to play around in the pity pool for a time getting splashed with more and more disappointed as my ‘woe is me’ thinking–that untruth that swirls in the head–began to flooding into my mind.  Wow, I was really beginning to drown myself in self-proclaimed despair.  I am this and I am not that…!  Suddenly I didn’t think I had a friend in the world and I even began to doubt my abilities as one thought streamed right into the next. Only God knows where this cesspool of thinking could have taken me!

Then, I received a revelation!  Just maybe God was protecting me, doing exactly what Paul says in Romans 8:28

“And we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose.”  

I began to look at various scenarios that could happen if things went as I desired for them to go. Instead, I decided to–by faith–believe that these disappointments were not intended to discourage me but to protect and prevent dire things from happening?  Then the Holy Spirit reminded me of that powerful word from 2 Corinthians 10:5 that ends with

“taking every thought captive to the obedience of Christ…” 

This certainly changed my entire outlook!

Line BreakYou see, God has empowered us, He has given us tools to help when we get all wrapped up in our own “stinkin’ thinkin” (remember that term?)

Although sometimes difficult, our part is to acknowledge the enemy's lies and then counteract them with God's… Click To Tweet

I really believe that we can all get in a funk like this at sometime or another in our ‘everyday’ living, but the key is admitting where we have landed. When our thinking is is incorrect according to God’s standard–what He says about His children–then I need to be willing to do something about it!  Start by applying 2 Corinthians 10:5

“We are destroying speculations and every lofty thing raised up against the knowledge of God,” then finish by…“taking every thought captive to the obedience of Christ.”

Yes, it can take a concerted effort but it is always better than staying in the pit which spells out destructive thoughts. Oh how the enemy of our soul likes to rob our joy!

Father, thank You for Your Holy Spirit that teaches us in the way in which we should go. Continue to give me listening ears to hear His voice and then a willingness to respond correctly when I am headed in a direction that spells out CALAMITY.  My heart wants to please You and I ask for grace when I walk contrary to Your excellent way!

Disappointments in Life…

Are there times in your life when you thought things would turn out so much differently than they have?  Times that have left you feeling a bit hollow inside and terribly disappointed? Like when a child grows up and grows away from the Lord instead of toward Him, or your dreams of being a missionary went south because for whatever reason be it money or relationship it became the wrong timing?  How about that first love that set your dreams on fire and then after a time the relationship fizzled and instead of fulfilling your dreams they brought about disappointments. And maybe it was the perfect job that you have waited for with all the amenities you could hope for and you were certain you had all the qualifications but you didn’t make the final round and someone else stepped into the position you longed for. 

Sometimes there are disappointments that totally change the course of your life.  That familiar saying “It just isn’t fair” can light upon you and pull you right down into the pit. Friend, I want you to know something and it isn’t anything new or profound but, it is truth and that is that God, in spite of our tendency to walk our own way, really is in control. Kind of like we are the vehicle but the Lord is our steering wheel.  Oh, I know He really does allow us to do our own thing, because He loves us so much!  He wants us to love Him back without restraints and of our own accord.  After all, how would it feel if your children only returned your affection because they were supposed too or your spouse because you had to ask? 

So what do we do with the disappointments in life?  We all have them to one degree or another and really, how we respond to those disappointments determines whether we will move forward or lag behind.  I would have to believe that like me you want to soar and draw closer and closer to the Lord.  Your reaction to these realities sets the course for the next leg of your life journey. 

Our journey in Christ takes the focus off of us and puts it on Him!  Every single thing that happens to us must glorify the Father.  I love that verse in Matthew 5:16  that says we are to let our light so shine before men that they would see our good works and glorify our Father in heaven.  And just for fun here it is in the Message paraphrase:

Now that I’ve put you there on a hilltop, on a light stand – shine! Keep open house; be generous with your lives. By opening up to others, you’ll prompt people to open up with God, this generous Father in heaven. 

When the disappointments come, those around us need to see how we handle them because after all there are plenty enough to go around in everyone’s life!  I recently received another hit and the rug was pulled out from under my feet.  Yes, for a moment I fell and hurt myself and briefly slipped into the pit of despair, but…I have a circle of friends that let me know that they care and they encircled me and prayed for me.  I am slowly getting back up on my feet again.  I hate when this happens but it does and there isn’t a one of us who doesn’t know what if feels like.   

I would like to give you some things to think about when your dark moment comes.

  • Don’t keep it hidden!  Go to your trusted prayer partners and yes, make yourself vulnerable and share just how upset you are and let them minister to you!
  • Ponder and pray when you hear a word for you even if it isn’t necessarily comfortable.  God will provide the comfort because He is the God of all comfort!
  • Set your face like flint not to revisit those debilitating emotions but focus on the truth! You will not move ahead until you do and the more often you revisit the deeper the pit gets.
  • Remember, God is your healer and He wants to bring you gently back to the firm ground you were on before.  Forgiveness is the key to moving forward and friend, I know just how difficult this one is but I also have tasted the sweetness when the enemy of our soul is defeated and forgiveness cuts the chains of our heart loose.
  • Do not get comfortable in the pain of your emotional battle.  God has given us the tools to get out of the pit.

The battle is in our minds and here is the Scripture that can help us work through the enemy’s ‘mosh pit’:

“We destroy arguments and every lofty opinion raised against the knowledge of God, and take every thought captive to obey Christ…”2 Corinthians 10:5

Unless we get our minds set on the truth we will become wounded as we are banged around by the lies and untruth that the enemy wants to use to render us useless to our Father.  Draw the line in the sand and do not go there.  If you have, get yourself in the truth of the Word and let that truth bath and comfort you and bring healing to your mind, body and soul! 

Father, too many times I have seen how ineffective I become when the enemy comes in like a flood!  But I am also so thankful to know I don’t have to go it alone and that In Your truth I am able to raise the standard that defeats the enemy of my soul.  You have provided brothers and sisters in Christ who thankfully become my help in times of trouble. Thank You for Your love for me and for gently picking me up when I become Your wounded warrior.  I choose to walk in the truth today, in Jesus’ name. 

Identifying Blocked Goals in Our Life

Strongholds, although this word can be seen as a save place or refuge, it is also the opposite where a certain mindset is used to hold us captive and when used as in the latter a stronghold just might be preventing us from living the abundant life.

Let’s begin by thinking about blocked goals. You know, the times when we set our sights on something like marrying our high school sweetheart but then he ran off with your best friend.  Or maybe like me you always wanted to be a teacher, even as a little girl, but things got in the way and when you finally decided to go to college your husband said no (not to college but to traveling over 200 miles each day to attend classes.) And maybe your child had such a caring heart for others and you really saw them becoming a missionary someday but they got into trouble along the way and have yet to find their way back into the church body. These are things that can really take the wind out of our sails and cause some deep-seated resentment toward God or others. The story of my prodigal has served to teach me many lessons that have been extremely painful and even drove me to temporarily delve into unbelief and hopelessness. 

My youngest son was difficult from the get-go. By kindergarten he was already having problems on the bus and with all authority figures. It is a long story but to bring you up to speed and when I suffered the biggest disappointment was over six years ago now. While sitting in jail and under my influence, he opted to see if the judge would let him go to Teen Challenge, in hopes of getting the help he needed to get his life straightened out. The judge court ordered him there and we were holding our breath thinking that this is it, this kid is finally going to turn things around. Teen Challenge is a twelve-month plus program that I really do believe in because they have proven very successful at helping anyone who is ready to help themselves recover from whatever it is that got them in the program! My son pulled himself out after seven and a half months and it was just like I was socked in the gut. I just knew this was the answer for my guy and that it would bring him back to the Lord and I was devastated. I wanted to throw my arms in the air and tell God that I give up, that’s it and that he is hopelessly lost. I really hope to never revisit this place again. 

Let me say that pitfalls like the blocked goal described above can turn into your times of preparation!  It can be a time of tilling the hardened soil around the heart. In a Bible study that I did many years ago called “Trials, Don’t Resent them as Intruders” the author, Juanita Purcell said this and it has stuck with me:

“Faith does not grow on a smooth road without obstacles.  However, we must view trials as steppingstones—not stumbling blocks.  Each trial we pass through should help us climb a little higher and draw us closer to Christ.”

We all have dreams that have been soured. And my prodigal’s situation is a perfect example of obvious disappointment. It is situations like this that the enemy uses us to render us hopeless! When we are in a hopeless mode it can lead to depression and depression is many times anger turned inward, a blocked goal. The plan didn’t develop the way that I thought it should have or would have if only…He had taken the road I knew would bring healing to his wounded spirit. What I found though, was that this was a lesson for me. You see God wanted me to know Who was in charge. And it wasn’t me! 

I am very grateful for an amazing little group of people who I pray with almost every week and we have met for going on eleven years. They are my prayer partners and accountability group and I thank God for them often. They played a big role in helping me to get back to believing that God would make a way where there seems to be no way.  For a good couple of months it was like I was numb. With their tough love and words of encouragement I soon found myself back on the journey of faith. It is certainly easy to see how I could have continued on the downward spiral of unbelief and become very bitter and angry. I could have missed out on walking in my kingdom purpose. 

Faith is where I need to rest when it comes to my goals being prohibited. 

Hebrews 11:1 (NKJ)

“Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.”

Do I trust God with the unknown?  Can I trust Him when circumstances take a different path than I anticipated?  Will I be able to admit that I am not in control and that there is Someone much greater and more trustworthy than I could ever be?  Who knows the beginning and the end and what is best? 

Father, I am so guilty of trying to step in and take charge but then so disappointed when my way didn’t quite turn out as I expected.  What I need to do is take a deep breath and then open the Word and look at the many times You were faithful to those whom You called Your own.  Faithful even when they didn’t deserve Your favor but Your judgement.  It is rock solid truth that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose.  Right now I am choosing to trust in You.