Out of the Desert…

I have had my dry times–spiritually speaking–where it seems as though I am crawling  through molasses. Have you ever experienced that? Everything is just as it always is and I then begin to sense the growing barrenness in my life. That old feeling of walking alone and out of sync with the flow. Everyone else seems to be alive and excited to be serving God but for some reason, I feel blah spiritually!Those times have been too often and frankly I do not like being there. It is a pathway that is weighty and bordering on sorrow and dare I say depression? 

I have never been in a sand dessert but for a time I did live in the northern part of New Mexico. It is not quite the same but there are some similarities with the hot dry, summers. In a sand desert, there is some life but not a bustling flurry of activity as in a thriving forest. It is simply too hot and dry.This ugly cactus plant of mine is rather similar to the plants that grow in the desert. It tends to thrive on very little water and it is so ugly that I almost wish it would die so I could get rid of it. I think it is about 45 years old and as you can see it doesn’t get huge. What grows (very slowly I might add) are these ugly long fronds or whatever you call them with their prickly little edges (although not like the usual cacti with its thorns.) It sits rather lopsided in my pot and obstructs my husbands view of the television if I don’t turn it around the other way. 

My dry times can be just like that old cactus, dry, barren, lonely and fruitless. It really is a terrible place to be. I am not even nice to be around because I have no joy, motivation or energy. I just want to hang it up. Interestingly, it even causes those that I am around to get cranky, like my husband. My hard places don’t just effect me, they also have an impact on those around me. My co-workers know when Kimberly Dawn is going through rough times because I am usually a pretty joy-filled person. (Praise God!) But not with the weight of the world on my shoulders, pressing me down! Or a mind preoccupied with relationships gone awry. 

However, it is in these valleys where my sorrow is caused by my own poor choices. If you are a relational person like me, you know how important people are in your life, you need them to interact with and fellowship with and just to enjoy life with. Thank you Lord for creating fellowship with one another. But then a quirky communication takes place and an offense comes along and suddenly the joy has been robbed. I have reacted by making provision for the flesh, and harbor bitterness or jealousy in my heart and wham, down I go and it is time to linger in the desert for a few rounds about the mountain. My thoughts are possessed with wrong thinking. My reactions are very “me” centered around all my thoughts and hurt feelings. Woe is me, they don’t understand, what about my feelings on the issue and don’t I have a “right” to feel the way I do? Just look how they have hurt me! It is amazing what we will try to justify! 

When I go to bed at night, I want sweet thoughts and pleasurable memories of my day or week. I want to reflect on the goodness of the Lord and to be able to see His hand in motion throughout my day. If I am in the midst of a desert experience I can’t see any of that, just poor, miserable me. If I dwell too long in that place I become dryer, harder and more and more lifeless and bitter in my own defense. What an icky place to be! 

How in the world do I come to an end of my desert journey? Thanks be to God for the power of the Holy Spirit in spite of quenching His Spirit with my “me-ness” mentality. Something jogs my heart and I begin to see that I am the problem not the other party. I’m the one who is holding on to the bitterness, unforgiveness, anger and resentment because all I can see is how mistreated I have been. God’s Word has sooo…much to say about the above list of excuses we use to stay in our desert-land: 

This Scripture from Matthew 5:23,24 really sheds a spotlight on relational issues out of sync:

So if you are standing before the altar in the Temple, offering a sacrifice to God, and you suddenly remember that someone has something against you, leave your sacrifice there beside the altar. Go and be reconciled to that person. Then come and offer your sacrifice to God.

I am believing that my offering to God is not going to amount to anything with resentment at the root of my heart. And I have worshiped and wondered why I couldn’t sense His presence and wondered why He seemed so distant from me. 

From Romans 13:14 Paul tells,

But put on the Lord Jesus Christ, and make no provision for the flesh, to fulfill its lusts.

And this includes along with all sorts of immoralities, strife and envy.  And once again from Mark 12:25

But when you are praying, first forgive anyone you are holding a grudge against, so that your Father in heaven will forgive your sins, too.

You have to admit that forgiveness is a huge issue in God’s eyes. I guess that means that I better make it a priority also. God says 7 times 70 and that if I cannot forgive then I too will not be forgiven. God forbid I don’t get a grasp on this one! So, what is my excuse now? Can I really justify my situation any longer? I don’t think so! Okay Holy Spirit, show me how to get myself to the watering hole ’cause I am so parched and desperately longing for Your presence once again. 

You see, with enough sunlight and just the right amount of water, that ugly old cactus does an amazing thing every once in a while. It unpredictably blooms. Sometimes only one or two but these huge gorgeous blooms come out of the most unlikely places. And like that blooming cactus, I too need adequate time in the “Son” so that I can produce fruit that will please my Father and bless others.  

How’s your heart today? Are you filled with bitterness and anger? Unforgiveness and resentments? The Lord would have us walking in the fruit of the Spirit which is right where I need to be so I want will exhibit those attributes toward others. It is through a victorious life that this fruit grows and is used to show others the love of Christ.

 Galatians 5:22,23

But when the Holy Spirit controls our lives, he will produce this kind of fruit in us: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. Here there is no conflict with the law.

Father, will You show me my unpleasantness and its root? I don’t want to be there anymore. I want the fruit of the Spirit to be evident in my life so that when others look at my life they see You. Help me to root out all the negative things like anger, resentment, bitterness, envy and strife those things that keep me in bondage. Set me free and even if I need to go to someone for forgiveness will You give me the grace to humble myself and approach that one so that we might be restored to fellowship with one another and with You? I trust that You will work out all the details of this in my life and that You will receive all the glory, honor and praise due Your Name. I will lean on Your promises and trust this to be resolved in Your perfect timing. Restore me Lord to Your presence and fill me with Your sweet Holy Spirit, in Jesus’ Name, Amen

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Are You a History Maker?

Today I have posted over here:

http://kimberlydawnnyborg.blogspot.com/2013/09/being-change-agent.html

It is the history of 911 and yes it made a difference in our country and world but even so, it is Christ in us the hope of glory that truly altars the course of history for eternity sake!

With some thoughts on being used by God to make a difference!

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Five Minute Friday–Red

Joining a fun Five Minute Friday blog posting on the queue Red…here we go:

Red, love the color in certain shades but I would say that because it is almost fall…that it is those lovely red hues

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that catch my attention. Here in the “Icebox of the Nation” they really stand out because they are minimally placed in the mixture of green and gold.

I love fall and I am so thankful for this time of year because it is when I am comfortable being outside. Less bug activity, much cooler (don’t do that 80 degree stuff very well) and well..I just love being out doors!

Camp retreats coming up! One for my church women at Bluewater Covenant Camp and then speaking for one at Crossroads Covenant the first weekend in October.

So is fall a busy time for you? Red, the color of fall maple leaves, harvested red tomatoes, red beets and I love the red we painted on our doors for the house and garage (small one on the garage:0)

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It’s the Right Thing to Do!

I recently received a revelation dealing with relationships. More specifically in dealing with relationships between believers. I am pretty certain that we all have been in the situation where we have either had an injustice done to us by a brother or sister-in-the Lord or we see these things being done to another. I don’t know about you but my first reaction is “how could they, and they call themselves Christians.” Honestly, like it or not we have all been on either side of the situation.

Before I continue, I want to put in a disclaimer. As I was laying in bed last night the Lord prompted me to do so because some of you are going to react negatively to this…I am not referencing people who have issues with being abusive, neglectful, or controlling. I do address the issue of confronting one caught in sin later. I am saying that all of us at some time or another have either mistreated or observed one who has mistreated or taken advantage of a brother or sister-in-the-Lord. If you want to discuss this further with me please feel free to email me personally. I do understand!

It really takes a person that is mature in their walk to respond correctly–in love and with grace–to a situation like this. Most of the time we begin to rally the troops, spread the scenario around like jam so it gets good and sticky and makes the offender out to be a horrible person. Even though they really aren’t horrible but have treated another horribly.

You have to love when the Holy Spirit does a number on you as you enter into the battle zone and suddenly you are heavily impressed upon to see the error of the way you are thinking and responding toward an offender. (I will call the person an offender simply because they mistreated another brother or sister-in-the-Lord.)  In a particular situation, my first reaction was to stir the pot of gossip…do you know what so-and-so just did…I can’t believe they treated _______ like that!

Don’t we typically think that Christians wouldn’t treat each other that way? Come on, that es a wrong assumption. Let’s face it, we all walk in the flesh from time to time but the bottom line is we shouldn’t. Here is a passage of Scripture that hits this on the mark:

Galatians 5:13-16

For you, brethren, have been called to liberty; only do not use liberty as an opportunity for the flesh, but through love serve one another. For all the law is fulfilled in one word, even in this: “You shall love your neighbor as yourself.” But if you bite and devour one another, beware lest you be consumed by one another! I say then: Walk in the Spirit, and you shall not fulfill the lust of the flesh.

And the fruit of the Spirit is, love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control…It is so easy to ignore some of the fruit, “longsuffering”, “kindness” and especially (for me that is) “self-control”. If we believe our instruction manual, it rather looks as though we have an obligation to one another, don’t you think?

Let’s go to an interesting story in the Old Testament where we see Noah enjoying the fruit of his labor, from his vineyard.

Genesis 9:20-24

Then Noah began farming and planted a vineyard. And he drank of the wine and became drunk, and uncovered himself inside his tent. And Ham, the father of Canaan, saw the nakedness of his father, and told his two brothers outside. But Shem and Japheth took a garment and laid it upon both their shoulders and walked backward and covered the nakedness of their father; and their faces were turned away, so that they did not see their father’s nakedness. When Noah awoke from his wine, he knew what his youngest son had done to him.

At this point Noah has done something foolish and been found out by his youngest son Ham. Ham then goes and make issue of it with his brothers Shem and Japheth. But they, instead of embarrassing their father, chose to cover his nakedness. As a cross reference to verse 21 we read in Proverbs 20:1 that “Wine is a mocker, strong drink a brawler, and whoever is intoxicated by it is not wise.” The two brothers were looking out for their father’s reputation and they wouldn’t even look upon him in his embarrassing state.

Let me ask you, have you done foolishly as a believer? There are many scenarios in my mind that I can replay that I sure wish weren’t there. Times where I opened my mouth and inserted my foot and wished I could take back what was said. You see, if we love God and love others then we need to take this new command and live it out, first with our brothers and sisters. In our own eyes we might look better, we might be a better “Christian” or maybe we are the somebody that really needs to set that person straight! This from Proverbs really speaks loudly to me

Proverbs 6:16-19 (ESV) “There are six things that the LORD hates, seven that are an abomination to him: haughty eyes, a lying tongue, and hands that shed innocent blood, a heart that devises wicked plans, feet that make haste to run to evil, a false witness who breathes out lies, and one who sows discord among brothers”.

Now I can hear someone say wait a minute. Are you saying that we don’t expose their sin? There is a mandate on how to handle that. In Matthew 18 it talks directly of confronting one caught in sin. But before I go there I better be sure that the log is out of my eye and my motives are only out of love and for the betterment of my brother or sister.

I wonder what happens when a non-believer witnesses the correct response to the outrageous behaviour of another beleiver? I would like to think they see one who loves God and loves others. Not bringing shame to the offender and not being antagonistic or a false witness. Although, I confess that this is still not easy stuff to appropriate! For the worldly way and our natural tendency is self-motivated but the Christlike way is selfless. The world says to expose, embarrass and sling the insults because it makes us appear better and they the fool. Christ’s way is just the opposite, we do not damage the reputation of our brother or sister.

So I’m certain I won’t pass every test that comes along in this area. But, when I do act correctly and look out for the well-being of a brother or sister-in-the Lord, as obnoxious as they can be, I have peace with myself and God.  And interestingly enough even with that offensive person.

Father God, these aren’t easy lessons to learn but this is a battle I want to win for Christ’s sake. I ask for wisdom and discernment to quicken immediately within me so I can see when I am headed in the wrong direction with my thinking. When I feel like I have every right to be angry at someone for whatever reason, let me hear Your still small voice speak “not I, but Christ..” We are not in this to win battles but to win others to Christ and to exhibit Christ’s love in all kinds of situations in life. How else will they know we are different? Like the old song says, “they will know we are Christians by our love…” Thank you for teaching me these hard lessons and giving me the heart’s desire to love You and love others. I surrender once again my right for Your will. In the powerful, life-changing name of Jesus!

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Pleasing God or Man…Where do You Stand?

I want to look at a couple of things that can really impact my effectiveness for Christ.  

  • If I am tuning in to what God’s will is for my life, then I am going to have to know His voice and respond in obedience when He calls.
  • By getting to know and recognize His voice I should be able to detect when the enemy comes along to pull me off track.

“My sheep hear My voice, and I know them, and they follow Me.”

John 10:27

Am I willing to forego pleasing men to be in the will of my Father? 

There are times it seems that so many things pull and vie for my attention and all I really want to do is what my Father has called me to do.  But, there is this voice over here that says how good I might be at that task or asking me if I could serve on this committee; and there was that burning desire in my heart to take up that cause so near and dear to me.  Oh, there are so many things that are calling my name. But then there are also the negative voices that say you are crazy if you think that you can do that or go there, or you are so unqualified to be even thinking of doing that job. But, I just want to please my Father. 

God can call us to do some pretty out-of-the-box things that people sometimes do not see as ‘God’ things. How would you respond to a friend who decides to move to the inner city to minister with a group of like-minded folks who see the lost and hopeless as another facet of God’s treasure? I don’t just mean a two week stint, I mean until further notice thiswill be the residency of that friend and his/her family? You might respond by saying that they are just too radical and throw all the ‘what if’s’ at them.  Would you try to convince them that they should not be thinking of doing such a crazy thing after all consider your family? And you might fire right off with whether they were really certain that it was God’s voice that they were responding to, right? These do seem to be pretty valid questions! 

I absolutely love when I run into or hear of someone who is so sold out and convinced beyond a shadow of a doubt that they are doing just what God has called them to do, radical or not.These are people who care about one thing and that is being obedient to their God-calling! The coolest part of this is that amazing things can happen when we are obedient to our calling. 

The flip side of this is when we succumb to the nay-sayers that keep us from taking that step forward instead consider man’s opinion over God’s calling, even if we know we are capable. On the other hand, you may appear to be totally unqualified according to man’s standards and yet God calls you in spite of your lack of qualifications and you do something you never imagined that you could do. 

This happened to me a few years ago when our church lost our worship arts director.  She was a gem that the Lord brought to us to usher in contemporary worship. Our church decided to hold two services, one traditional and one contemporary. Her husband, after three years with us was called to serve at a different church and we were left without our worship arts director.  She had asked me several times if I were interested but I just never believed I was qualified. I have minimal musical training but I love to worship. That was all I had to go on. After much persuasion and prayer I finally succumbed to the request and really gave it my best for a year. Friends, emotionally, it was one of the most difficult years I have ever had, I believe, primarily, because I allowed the varying comments of too many to cause me to doubt that I was doing what I was called to do. This affected the team, who lost confidence in me and began to resist my direction. It was a horrendous year emotionally and I have often wondered if I became too concerned with making the team members happy, or did I just not belong in that position? After all I was only there until someone came on board who was a ‘true’ director? I prayed and sought the Lord big time! I love the element that worship brings to the Sunday service and I love to worship, and I so wanted this to work out of my worshiper’s heart, but I leaned more on people’s varied opinions instead of my Father’s direction. I remember screaming out loud one morning, “Lord, I just want to please You!”  Well, circumstances at home would present a difficult summer ahead and I resigned the position after a year to be available to my mother who spends the summer with us. God knew I would not have the time required for the job and that I would be needed at home and frankly, it was a huge relief! 

At the radio station where I work, we run into so many opinions from our listeners and music is the subject that causes the most dissension. Some years back, we had a difficult time when we clearly felt the Lord was calling us to change our music emphasis to primarily praise and worship. We were headed for a top 40 Inspo format and three of us distinctly heard the calling from the Lord to open the music format up to praise and worship. Yes, it was different and yes, most stations were not going in that direction. Our calling was to raise a canopy of praise over northern Minnesota and Northwestern Ontario. We were called to help usher in the presence of the Lord in a very hardened and dark region. We definitely ruffled feathers and  it would have been much easier to try to flex to fit the opinion of many listeners. But the risk in compromise is that you lose sight of your calling for the ministry and what it is that God wants to do. We have to remember our focus, our calling, our purpose and that God, the creator of the universe, has positioned us to accomplish His purposes and His voice is really the voice we need to be listening to, not the opinions of hundreds of people who may or may not know what that calling is. Yes, it is difficult and people can be hurt or upset if when we do not consider their opinions. 

So why is it so…hard to move in God’s direction? Most of us want to be loved and accepted and I do not know anyone who likes rejection, but if you are doing what you are called to do you very likely will take some heat for choosing to please God instead of man. But, how precious are the words of our Father as we read of the parable of the servants who tended to their master’s business while he was off in another country!

Matthew 25: 20-21  “So he who had received five talents came and brought five other talents, saying, ‘Lord, you delivered to me five talents; look, I have gained five more talents besides them.’  His lord said to him, ‘Well done, good and faithful servant; you were faithful over a few things, I will make you ruler over many things. Enter into the joy of your lord.’”

Father, I love You so much and I truly want to ‘dance’ for You and serve You with all my heart.  But sometimes I hear voices that cause me to second guess whether I am doing the right thing.I am asking that You help me to know You more and to recognize Your voice when You call me to do Your will. I so want to hear you say well done, Kimberly; you have served Me well…enter into the joy of your Lord!”  Your word says in Proverbs 16:7 that “When a man’s ways please the Lord, He makes even his enemies to be at peace with him.”  The rewards for walking in obedience to Your calling are well worth the difficulty that can come when we are a God pleaser!  Thank you for giving me the courage to press on for Christ’ sake and in His name!

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A Sacrifice of Praise

“I really don’t want to go there!”

“What’s to praise in this situation?”

“You’ve got to be kidding; worship when I feel the way I do?”

Have you ever been at that place where you were devastated by a situation, at the height of frustration and wondering how will you ever get turned around from thinking there is no hope, and will the end of a situation ever come? I don’t know about you, but I don’t like conflict and I don’t like when things get messy because I can’t see the way out while being in the thick of it.

When I’m frustrated and put out, my first response has been to build a wall and gather my defenses. But God has shown me over the past few years that it is out of my insecurities that I respond that way when hurt or devastated. After all, who wants to admit that “I” am wrong when it’s easier to say “they” are wrong? I don’t want to admit that I am insecure.Nyborg 0037

God began to gently show me a few things about myself a few years back that He has used to teach me and grow me up a bit. But I had to get to that place where I was willing to look inwardly at the messy stuff in my heart. When we give ourselves over to His redeeming work, He then has permission to start messing with and exposing things that are deficits and have taken up residence for far too long in our hearts.

Worship has been a tremendous tool that God has used in my life over the past several years. As I would draw closer to Him with the desire to get to know Him more, I began to see myself for who I really was. As I pulled in closer to God, I saw His majesty and my yucky, messy self–just like that passage I love in Isaiah 6 where Isaiah gets the vision of God seated on the throne. Isaiah saw how unclean and sinful he really was.

Isaiah 6:5 (The Message paraphrase) reads, “I said, ‘Doom! It’s Doomsday! I’m as good as dead! Every word I’ve ever spoken is tainted–blasphemous even!  And the people I live with talk the same way, using words that corrupt and desecrate. And here I’ve looked God in the face! The King!’”

It was a rude awakening, for sure, and that gentle revealing helped me see that the root of insecurity came from not really understanding the holiness of the God I chose to serve or my identity in Jesus Christ. You cannot walk a certain way if you do not understand or know that way. Those were some tough realizations. But then I began to sense a shift taking place in my heart as I saw myself for who I really was and then understood that Christ came to change all of the old into the new. We can have a whole lot of knowledge but never apply it.  A lot of good that does! I could see how I had become one of those weak women that Timothy talks about in 2 Timothy 3:7 “always learning and never able to come to the knowledge of the truth.” To put it mildly, I didn’t like what I saw but was now ready to do something about it.

Sacrifice –– it is a big word with a meaning that is sometimes glossed over. It is the surrender or destruction of something prized or desirable. So is it possible that relinquishing my old behavior in exchange for His peace could be seen as my sacrifice of praise? Would I be willing to lay down my old self and offer up that praise offering, even my old, comfortable self?

Hebrews 13:15 says “Through Him then, let us continually offer up a sacrifice of praise to God, that is, the fruit of lips that give thanks to His name.”

Is there anything stirring within your heart that needs a readjustment? If you sense discontentment then it is time to draw near to the heart of the Perfect One who will show you what needs to be offered up in exchange for something so much better!

It only takes a glimpse of the Holy One to see yourself as you really are, desperately in need of a Savior. As I glance back at that time in my life, I can surely praise His name for allowing me to be uncovered to discover that I had to let go of who I was and embrace Christ in me, the hope of glory. The “new” that is growing in me helps me to see just how great He really is. With excitement I can sing, “To God be the glory, great things He has done.” (and continues to do!)

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Generational Sins

Proud parents are continuously acknowledging–from the moment of birth–just how much their children look like either mom or dad.  They might see characteristics of grandma and grandpa too, such as the nose, eyes, forehead or mouth.  As the

Grannie and her Grandson Isaac
Grannie and her Grandson Isaac

children grow and develop, the opportunity may arise to begin to see familiar temperaments as well.  They may be positive or they could be negative.  You will hear comments such as “look at her, she is such a girly girl, just like her mom” or maybe “boy, has he got a stubborn streak, just like his dad.”  It is inevitable that we will take on similar looks and characteristics as genetic dispositions.  If only it was just the positive, good qualities that were evident, unfortunately that is not always so. 

If we look at this a bit deeper, we can also see how it is possible to “inherit” those good and bad tendencies.  Let me give you an example from my own life.  Divorce is not a pleasant thing to think about and go through.  Unfortunately in my family it is a prevalent occurrence. Not only has my mom been divorced twice but my grandmother once.  I recently had it pointed out that my great grandmother had been divorced three times!  That was extremely unusual and frowned upon in that day.  Sadly, I too have also gone through a divorce.  Now as a Christian, it makes me sorrowful and guarded to know that my three children could have the ‘tendency’ to fall into this unfortunate pattern and as a matter of fact one of my children has already succumbed to the divorce solution.  It is interesting yet sad that my father too was also divorced twice.  Therein that has only made for a double whammy for our family, argh! 

So how can and do we break this vicious cycle? 

God is teaching me many things right now and for the most part He is showing me how to learn to be dependent upon and put my trust in Him.  I only bring this up because my “independent” nature has gotten me into so much trouble through the years!  The world tells us that independence is good and I really do believe there can be a positive side to it.  But God calls us to lay down our independent spirit and to take up complete dependency upon Him. Generationally speaking, our family has a problem with that.  We have had to be survivors and have done just the opposite of what the Word tells us in Proverbs 3:5-8

“Lean on, trust in, and be confident in the Lord with all your heart and mind and do not rely on your own insight or understanding.  In all your ways know, recognize, and acknowledge Him, and He will direct and make straight and plain your paths.  Be not wise in your own eyes; reverently fear and worship the Lord and turn [entirely] away from evil.  It shall be health to your nerves and sinews, and marrow and moistening to your bones.”  (Amplified version)

It is so ironic that God includes the healthful benefits of our being dependent upon Him!  (The first thing I thought of when I read the ‘moistening to your bones’ section was how arthritis is deterioration of our joint cushioning and once again, our family as they age tend to develop this condition!)  I am diligently learning to work through and break the habit of leaning on Kimberly Dawn’s understanding and lack of wisdom! 

The key focus here is that–while it is obvious that not everything we inherit is bad–there are or can be some debilitating ‘bends’ or ‘tendencies’ that affect our living the abundant life.  Do you ever wonder why you only move forward with baby steps?  Or why you might keep doing and revisiting the same negative habit over and over?  It is possible that it could be a generational sin or tendency.  After all the Word tells us the sins of the fathers will revisit to the third and the fourth generations!  Now that is a scary thought and I am living proof that it is so.  But the good news is we do not have to stay there! 

While it is wonderful to inherit the wonderful and admirable qualities of our family and ancestors, when we are earnestly seeking God we need to allow Him to show us our short comings.  That might involve a painful look into our past.  It might be that you can recognize your stronghold as an excuse to continue to behave in an un-Christ-like way.  The old “devil made me do it” mentality just does not fly for the Spirit led, abundant life.  God really does have a better plan in mind for us and He has called us to go higher, and challenged us to a deeper level in our walk with Him.  In Romans 6:6 we find that we are no longer slaves to sin.  And that means that I really have been given the power to overcome every bad tendency–even if it goes back to the 100th generation!

1 Peter 2:9,10 (NASB)

“But you are a chosen race, a royal priesthood, a people for God’s own possession, so that you may proclaim the excellencies of Him who has called you out of darkness into His marvelous light; for you once were not a people, but now you are the people of God; you had not received mercy but now you have received mercy.”

Abba Father, I want others to see You in my life.  I want them to see the difference You have made in me.  It is because of You that I am alive!  With all that You have brought me through and healed me from I can publicly rejoice and declare Your faithfulness to me and to my next generations.  I am not who I used to be because Your love broke through the darkness that once bound me and caused me much pain.  Let me continue to make myself available to Your refining fire then others will see how truly marvelous and in love with Your children that You are.  I rejoice and praise You as I walk in Your marvelous light.

For a look at another stumbling block visit Blocked Goals.

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From Lessons…

Canadian Smoosh Team during Ice Box Days

This week you will find me over here at Lessons from the Field where I have fun putting my lessons in written format!  I may toggle back and forth now and again!

“I live in International Falls, Minnesota. People have said to me “why would you want to live in that ‘God forsaken’ part of the world? After all, our slogan is the “Ice Box of the Nation.” Can you imagine being in one of the coldest parts of the lower 48? Funny thing is I love to tell people when they ask that I love where I have been planted!” Read more…“ 

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Identifying Blocked Goals in Our Life

Strongholds, although this word can be seen as a save place or refuge, it is also the opposite where a certain mindset is used to hold us captive and when used as in the latter a stronghold just might be preventing us from living the abundant life.

Let’s begin by thinking about blocked goals. You know, the times when we set our sights on something like marrying our high school sweetheart but then he ran off with your best friend.  Or maybe like me you always wanted to be a teacher, even as a little girl, but things got in the way and when you finally decided to go to college your husband said no (not to college but to traveling over 200 miles each day to attend classes.) And maybe your child had such a caring heart for others and you really saw them becoming a missionary someday but they got into trouble along the way and have yet to find their way back into the church body. These are things that can really take the wind out of our sails and cause some deep-seated resentment toward God or others. The story of my prodigal has served to teach me many lessons that have been extremely painful and even drove me to temporarily delve into unbelief and hopelessness. 

My youngest son was difficult from the get-go. By kindergarten he was already having problems on the bus and with all authority figures. It is a long story but to bring you up to speed and when I suffered the biggest disappointment was over six years ago now. While sitting in jail and under my influence, he opted to see if the judge would let him go to Teen Challenge, in hopes of getting the help he needed to get his life straightened out. The judge court ordered him there and we were holding our breath thinking that this is it, this kid is finally going to turn things around. Teen Challenge is a twelve-month plus program that I really do believe in because they have proven very successful at helping anyone who is ready to help themselves recover from whatever it is that got them in the program! My son pulled himself out after seven and a half months and it was just like I was socked in the gut. I just knew this was the answer for my guy and that it would bring him back to the Lord and I was devastated. I wanted to throw my arms in the air and tell God that I give up, that’s it and that he is hopelessly lost. I really hope to never revisit this place again. 

Let me say that pitfalls like the blocked goal described above can turn into your times of preparation!  It can be a time of tilling the hardened soil around the heart. In a Bible study that I did many years ago called “Trials, Don’t Resent them as Intruders” the author, Juanita Purcell said this and it has stuck with me:

“Faith does not grow on a smooth road without obstacles.  However, we must view trials as steppingstones—not stumbling blocks.  Each trial we pass through should help us climb a little higher and draw us closer to Christ.”

We all have dreams that have been soured. And my prodigal’s situation is a perfect example of obvious disappointment. It is situations like this that the enemy uses us to render us hopeless! When we are in a hopeless mode it can lead to depression and depression is many times anger turned inward, a blocked goal. The plan didn’t develop the way that I thought it should have or would have if only…He had taken the road I knew would bring healing to his wounded spirit. What I found though, was that this was a lesson for me. You see God wanted me to know Who was in charge. And it wasn’t me! 

I am very grateful for an amazing little group of people who I pray with almost every week and we have met for going on eleven years. They are my prayer partners and accountability group and I thank God for them often. They played a big role in helping me to get back to believing that God would make a way where there seems to be no way.  For a good couple of months it was like I was numb. With their tough love and words of encouragement I soon found myself back on the journey of faith. It is certainly easy to see how I could have continued on the downward spiral of unbelief and become very bitter and angry. I could have missed out on walking in my kingdom purpose. 

Faith is where I need to rest when it comes to my goals being prohibited. 

Hebrews 11:1 (NKJ)

“Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.”

Do I trust God with the unknown?  Can I trust Him when circumstances take a different path than I anticipated?  Will I be able to admit that I am not in control and that there is Someone much greater and more trustworthy than I could ever be?  Who knows the beginning and the end and what is best? 

Father, I am so guilty of trying to step in and take charge but then so disappointed when my way didn’t quite turn out as I expected.  What I need to do is take a deep breath and then open the Word and look at the many times You were faithful to those whom You called Your own.  Faithful even when they didn’t deserve Your favor but Your judgement.  It is rock solid truth that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose.  Right now I am choosing to trust in You.

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Is There a Prodigal in Your Life?

Years ago when my youngest (troubled) son was in a locked facility to get help (he was an unhealthy hazard to himself and others), I was sharing my heart with Amy Shreve the night after a concert here in I-Falls.  I was so grieved for this son who has had problems since fighting me in the womb!  It is true!  Too many heartaches and broken promises that he would straighten up go right which all never amounted to success.  This mother’s heart hurt so badly to see him fail time and time again.  Not to mention the stress it put on my marriage.  How easy it can be to place blame!  It’s my fault, the father’s fault, the stepfather’s fault, everybody else’s fault but no owning up to their own.  Now living the dysfunctional life I have lived has only helped me take on unnecessary blame for a whole host of things that were only partially my fault as I truly was doing the best I knew how.

I believe that we are only responsible for the situations that we directly cause and not the speculative ones (if only you…)  If I steal something, I am at fault, not the person who doesn’t lock his door to keep a thief out.  If onlys are pure speculation but we can really let ourselves get buried under them if we are not wise.  Stuff happens, we make mistakes, acknowledge them, confess them and ask forgiveness of those we have wronged and move on.  How sad when we become buried under guilt and condemnation that really isn’t ours to assume provided we have responded correctly like mentioned above. We can become overwhelmed with false guilt.

Prodigals are used by God to help us look at the truth in our own situations. Looking

By lat454205 / Lisa
Hope By lat454205 / Lisa

back I can now see that there are things that could have been handled differently and with a whole lot more unconditional love.  But then the child has a responsibility also.  They become runners.  Runners from the truth, their pain and anything that gets uncomfortably close to their emotions.  They need help to see that their poor choices are what they need to own up to.  I am responsible for my choices and my children for theirs, my spouse His, etc.  It is a dynamic that I just don’t know how people without the Lord survive and many don’t.

I have attached a link to an Oswald Chamber’s reading for March 24.  This is what Amy came to show me the next morning when she had been praying for me and my prodigal.  It wasn’t even March but she came upon it and shared it with me and it has had a very profound impact on my thinking.  You see dysfunctionality breeds false guilt which therefore won’t let the wrong assume their sorrows and pain that they find themselves in.  He must increase… If God is sovereign and in control and I believe He is, then every thing, large and small is used by Him (He is fully aware of it’s happening) to grow us up and closer to Him.  According to Chambers, we can become the very thing that gets in the way of our prodigal learning (yes the hard way) his lessons.

Some of us have to learn the hard way, I know I have.  If someone comes along to smooth out the situation instead of letting the circumstantial consequences teach the lesson then that someone has interrupted the class and the lesson may be postponed until a later date and possibly a more severe situation.  The verse for the March 24th devotional was from John 3:30 and it is simple and profound, “He must increase, but I must decrease”.  Get out of the way and let God be God and the Holy Spirit do what it is that He desires to do in a wandering soul’s heart!  In modern day terms we would say quit being an enabler!  Friend, I have had to say this to myself over and over because that is what I was so used to doing to try and make things right and work!  But I was the one who continued to get in the way.

So I pray that we would not be in the way of the catylist that the Lord would use to work in the heart of that one who is walking contrary to God’s ways.

Father, I cautiously say, do it Lord, whatever it takes to break the heart of the wanderer so that they would look beyond themselves and see You!  I know You will give me the courage to believe that You hold his or her life in Your hands and that Your desire is to see them come to You and give them the peace they have been searching for.  I even say thank you for the hard lessons that I have had to learn because You used them to bring me much closer to You each time.  I not only love You Lord, but I trust You and entrust my loved ones to You, in Jesus’ Name!

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